Monday, June 1, 2009

Losing It

Well, folks, the floodgates have finally broke open. I have an uncanny knack of not crying at those moments in life that I most expect, like my wedding and sometimes even funerals. So it wasn't looking at her referral pictures, seeing our first care package delivered, or even finding out our case is temporarily closed; none of these events that should have in fact brought me to tears did. But when I received this evening a plethora of photos and two videos from the Bayly's, who arrived home Saturday with their son, Tate, I cracked. And I don't mean one glistening down my cheek in a dainty way kind of tears, I mean hiccuping, snot nosed, red faced for an hour tears. It was the blessed gift of hearing my daughter's cry for the very first time. I keep watching the same 17 second video over and over and over again, each time looking for some new feature in my daughter's face, hands, or feet. Her little cheeks are filling out so nicely, I just want to squeeze them. And her hands! Her fingers are getting oh-so-long, and my heart just breaks because I'm not there to witness this tiny miracle. The lull between pictures is almost too much for my tender heart.
We are humbled and so very much appreciate your continuing prayers, thoughts, and encouraging notes. Please keep them coming. We have a conference call with our agency on Wednesday about the temporary delay, and I am praying for some news of progress. As always, I'll keep you posted with as much information as I can share.

For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 2 Corinthians 1:5

3 comments:

IUgirl78 said...

I just can't imagine how bittersweet that is to see new pictures and videos of Mia, only to be saddened because you are not with her. I will be lifting you up in prayer this week in hopes that you will hear good news at your conference on Wednesday.

K_I_T_ said...

Im sure it was an overwhelming sound to hear you baby's voice for the first time. Im sure that will be with you for a long time. I hope that what ever the hold up is, it will be lifted quickly and you are back on your way.

Emily said...

You're always in our thoughts, as is Mia. Gabrielle sat on the potty today, picking out toys "for Baby Mia" out of toy catalog. Can't wait to get them for her "for real!" I'm so glad that although the case in on hold, you at least got new video and photos of how she is progressing. I hope you find solace in knowing that she is being well taken care of. The day for you to hold her in your arms is not far.