Well, we've had some ups and downs over the last few weeks. I was very excited to be on vacation last week, and I spent a lot of time getting ready for the baby since our fall is so very hectic and full. I went with a good friend (also a new mom) to register at Babies R Us, I registered for some cloth diapers at comfybummy.com, and we also bought her crib and chest of drawers (or chester drawers, as my husband so affectionately calls them). Plus I scheduled appointments with prospective pediatricians in my area. I was on it.
Our downs? Well, all this planning for the baby really made me want the baby...now. I had a very difficult time returning to work after a week of baby stuff. And part of what makes it so difficult for me is not knowing what kind of time frame we're working with. The thought of having to wait until next March or April really makes me almost deflate. We also found out Ethiopia is raising their country fees, which will affect us by about $4,000.
So what keeps me sane in the midst of all this uncertainty? The fact that our God is sovereign in all things. No matter how difficult it is to see or understand, He is always in control; nothing surprises Him. And in the strangest moments, just when I'm ready to give up, He reminds me of His all-surpassing love for me. That alone is unfathomable. I am humbled that the God of this vast universe takes the time to love me...and you...completely and perfectly. That's what keeps me going. When I look around at the uncertain state of our economy, the upcoming elections, the 4 year old boy in our congregation who's fighting a losing battle to brain cancer, the massive famine in Ethiopia...I have to accept and know God is in total control and does love this world.